Sheikha M.
I grew up in an African society where discussing mental health was taboo. People didn’t understand depression, and those who suffered from it, like my mother, were often thought to be possessed. Seeing how society ignored my mother’s struggles, I felt compelled to appear normal and happy all the time.
I worked hard to project an image of happiness. I smiled constantly, went clubbing with friends on weekends, talked about movies and trends, and made everyone laugh. On days when I was too tired to keep up the facade, I would keep myself busy at home or work.
No matter how much money I made, how many things I bought, how many people I dated, or how well I lived, the joy from these things was always temporary. I felt a persistent emptiness inside, as if something crucial was missing. I longed for a happiness that didn’t fade.
Even though I seemed like the life of the party, inside I was struggling. I got upset easily, felt a void that friends, dinners, and concerts couldn’t fill, and was overwhelmed by constant thoughts. When things didn’t go my way, I felt betrayed and blamed others. I was exhausted from the pressure to keep up appearances.
Eventually, I realized I was not so different from my mother—empty inside but better at hiding it. I wanted to experience real happiness, not just pretend. One day, I came across a website that promised what I had been seeking: “cleanse your mind.” This led me to a meditation center.
Through meditation, I let go of the need to fit in and seek temporary highs. I still spend time with friends, but I no longer rely on them to fill my void. Meditation helped me embrace myself and find lasting happiness.
Now, I feel truly free. I have gained mental strength and awareness, and positivity comes naturally. I’ve found my true happiness within myself, and I appreciate every moment of life. Breathing without worries or stress is a beautiful experience. I am genuinely happy now.
